Apology please?

I’m sorry, so sorry.  Please accept my apology.  Why are those words so difficult to say?

Before you read any further, just let me say I apologize for the following entry.  If you checked in today to read something uplifting, I’m sorry, you will not find that here.  If you thought my blog would give you a good laugh, or an encouraging word, or a thought to ponder, forgive me please, not today.

This week is busy, I’m tired and a little cranky, add in a few occurrences that raised my dander, and the result is I’m subjecting you to a rant.  If you want to leave now, I don’t blame you.  I’ll never know you clicked on that red square with a white X on it and left my blog site early.  I won’t hold it against you if you check out now.

But if you’re still reading, I truly want to know what you think.  Hang in there with me, read what happened, and then please let me know your thoughts.

I have an upcoming event that I must attend.  I work part-time for a non-profit organization and every year we must fund-raise to sustain our yearly budget.  One of our major events is a fancy fund-raising banquet.  My problem is a typical female problem – I have nothing to wear!

This year we are also holding a fund-raising luncheon on the same day, so it will be a long, tiring day and wearing high heels is not going to be an option as I will be on my feet a lot.  So I stopped by a shoe store today to look for a nice pair of black but cute flats to wear.

The store wasn’t very busy, only a couple of customers besides me.  I was there maybe 10 or 15 minutes, found a pair of shoes, and proceeded to the counter to pay for them.  I was not prepared for what assaulted my ears and my propriety next.  The sales person without even looking up dropped the f-bomb on me.  Her comment was “I’m not going to get any #@#$*/#  sleep this week.”

I literally just stared at her when she finally looked up.  She opened her mouth and eyes and said, “Ohhhhh.”  And then she said she was embarrassed and thought I was the other sales clerk, who then appeared and asked what happened.  The second clerk laughed and said, “You’ll have to excuse her, she’s tired and works two jobs.”

I know she didn’t purposely say the word to me but you know what? I didn’t want to excuse her.  I didn’t say “that’s ok” because really I don’t think it is okay.  And I didn’t laugh with them.

So when did working two jobs excuse you to drop expletives on your customers?  And why did she feel it was appropriate to use foul language in a place of business anyway?  I might add that there were children in the store as well.  A few years ago, she would have been fired for using that word in front of a customer.

I wanted to say to both of them, “Excuse me? Do you really feel it’s appropriate to laugh that off?”  That’s probably not the best attitude on my part, but I am extremely fed up with being affronted by obscenity and profanity every where I go.  I’ve had it!  I get just as weary, angry, or frustrated as any other human being, but I do not blast foul language on anyone who happens my way.  To me, it’s a matter of respect, decency, and politeness.

So I just looked at both of them and kept waiting for it…..an apology, at least.   It didn’t come.  I thought of just walking out of the store, if I hadn’t needed the shoes so badly.

The clerk just kept mumbling that she was embarrassed, but obviously not enough to apologize for using profanity in front of a customer.  Instead of apologizing, she tried to sell me shoe care products, which I politely declined.

The other clerk decided to add a story about the time she also used a nasty word and hadn’t realized she had said it.  I still didn’t laugh.  I just said, “I hope you have a better day tomorrow” as I paid for my shoes.  Finally, as she handed me my bag, she mumbled almost inaudibly “sorry.”

My questions to you:

  • Was I wrong for how I handled it?  Was I wrong to expect an apology?
  • How do you respond when someone uses profane language in front of you?
  • Are you as tired of hearing it as I am?  Or am I just an old cranky fuddy-duddy?

Thanks for reading my rant.  I’m sorry, I had to get it off my chest.  But at least you can be happy for me because I do have new cute shoes.

©2010 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

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10 responses

    • I’m not sure that I was gracious, maybe just dumb-founded? Because at first I couldn’t figure out why she was saying that. Of course, the more I thought about it, the more angry I became, especially because neither one of the clerks thought to offer apologies.

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  1. Was I wrong for how I handled it? No, you were fine. Except I must toss into the ring this was a good gospel opportunity.
    Was I wrong to expect an apology? People of the Lord’s flock get used to others having contrition. The world does not know what contrition is.
    How do you respond when someone uses profane language in front of you? I have been known to quote the verse, “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.” Today, I had to quote that verse to …myself…
    Are you as tired of hearing it as I am? Thankfully, I am not exposed to cursing very often.
    Or am I just an old cranky fuddy-duddy? The vote’s still out on that one…. JK LOL

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    • Thanks for your thoughts! As always, they are wise. Good verse to remember too. I would like to know how you are NOT exposed to cursing though because I hear it on the sidewalk, in the parking lot, in the doctor’s office waiting room, in the grocery store….literally, everywhere I go, even by those who proclaim to be believers. Don’t tell me there is a “no cursing” law out there on your side of the country, because I don’t believe it! LOL And finally, hey….if the vote’s still out on the fuddy-duddy question, then all I got to say is “takes one to know one!” 😀 j/k!

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  2. I find myself agreeing with Elsie on this one. (not on the old fuddy duddy thing). I know that there is not a lot of time for gospel sharing in these sorts of situations, however, a word or two and a gospel tract could be the very thing that the Lord uses to save her soul. When the heart is changed by the Lord’s hand, everything else falls into place…..eventually. 🙂 (His glorious sanctification process) It can be a very handy thing to have on hand. They have some great tracts out there, especially for this time of year. 🙂

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  3. I would say that a professed believer then needs a firmer correction/rebuke from their elder sister in Christ. And certainly use of the scriptures would be the most appropriate in this case, as they should already be familiar with it. Somehow, though, people are not familiar with the word, and so they do err, not knowing the scriptures, all the more reason to lovingly bring correction. There can be a bit more grace for those who are not in Christ, for they are not able to spiritually discern the scriptures (usually because they do not read them or don’t even have their own copy of them)…although this does not excuse the behavior, that is why we Christians are here…to tell them of the Lord and of His grace and forgiveness of our sins. That is how I would, by the Lord’s grace, handle this sort of situation.

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  5. I’m so sorry you had to hear that and that she wasn’t more aware of the people around her. For many years I heard that language in school and I didn’t think twice about directing a comment to the student in question. Since I was at school, the kids expected me to react, but out in the world, I have to keep my retorts/admonitions to myself. I don’t know how I would have reacted, but I think my instincts would have taken over and I would have (1) stared not saying a word, or (2) smiled and said something like “That bad, huh?” only to engage eye contact and share some unexpected warmth (3) or, I might have let my high school teacher self come out and say “I’m glad your mother didn’t hear that.” (Of course, one has to be careful because one’s relationship with mom can vary or perhaps mom is not around anymore.) Very delicate indeed.

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    • The problem is that this kind of offensive language is heard everywhere. In stores, walking through parking lots, in schools, even in the workplace. I wonder how we got to the point where it’s considered acceptable? I think it’s because in this politically correct world, we don’t dare to speak against it. Uh-oh…I think I’m just being controversial! 😉

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