Because someday…

I woke up feeling cranky that day.  I’m not sure why so I’ll chalk it up to a restless night’s sleep or strange dreams or something.

Later that morning when I began cleaning our master bathroom shower, the glass shower door came off the track. 

I fidgeted with it, fussing and fuming until finally I gave up because I still couldn’t get it seated properly.  And that caused me to be even grouchier.

Thinking a cup of hot tea would surely soothe the savage beast that seemed to rage inside me, I made my way to the kitchen.  Stepping into the dining room, I noticed the new curtains that I had just ironed the day before were wrinkly.  “Are you kidding me?”  I thought.  Grrr!

About that time, hubby came home from taking some of that ‘too much stuff’ from our basement hoard, which also makes me irritated, to the recycling center.  Not long after he stepped into the kitchen, I was growling about yet another issue.

“Wow, why are you so cranky?” he asked. “Get up on the wrong side of the bed?”

You know, when you’ve been married for 30 plus years, you should realize and remember what floats your spouse’s boat and also what just pushes his or her buttons.

And hubby was punching my buttons!  Or so it seemed to me.  The more he pushed, the more I griped and growled.

This unhappy sequence continued for most of the day.  And although he fixed the shower door and even finished cleaning the shower for me, and helped me hang the curtains, I still wanted to bite his head off.

Outside – with snow flurries in the middle of April for heaven’s sake!  – proved just as miserable and cold as it was inside. When hubby suggested we grab a burger for dinner, I balked.  I really didn’t want to go out on this very un-spring-like day and I’m certain I even complained about that.

But off we went anyway to a local fast food place.  On our way there, we argued in one of those ‘you misunderstood what  I meant’ kind of disagreements, and this time, hubby was the one who exhibited crabbiness.

Guess it became contagious. 

We ordered our burgers and sat in silence while we ate.  And that’s when I noticed them.

The two of them sat alone in a booth behind my husband.  I figured they were in their 80’s.  She sat directly beside him and talked softly to him as he slowly chewed his food.  She helped him lift his drink cup and maneuvered the straw in the direction of his mouth so he could sip his strawberry lemonade.

He was bothered by crumbs on his pants but couldn’t quite knock them off, so she did it for him.  She even wiped his runny nose.

And right there in the middle of that Wendy’s restaurant, I wanted to cry. 

I watched this married couple and the picture I witnessed was one of abiding love.  The gentleman obviously suffered from frail health; I’m guessing that he had endured a slight stroke.  He must have lost weight during his illness as well because he wore his wedding band, which matched his wife’s, on the middle finger of his left hand not his ring finger.

He answered slowly and quietly when his wife asked him something. And each time she came to his aid, he looked at her with gratitude.  In conjunction, she treated him with patience and kindness.

I don’t think anyone else in the restaurant noticed them except me.  As I sat there trying to swallow bites of hamburger around the huge lump in my throat and struggling not to let tears erupt, I knew I saw this couple for a reason.  On this very day.

Someday, ‘they’ might be ‘us.’  That’s what I thought.  And the image of a day that might come in the future moved me to conviction to be so very grateful for now.  This moment, this day.

All day I had been cantankerous with my husband.  My husband – the one I love – who is healthy and strong and good-hearted and willingly endures the likes of me.  And I knew deep in my heart and soul that he didn’t deserve the treatment I had just given him.

I’m certain that God revealed the scene that unfolded in front of my eyes to put a check in my spirit, to remind me to be grateful for my marriage partner, even if he does push my buttons.  And God reminded me that I need to season my words with grace and love and patience and kindness.

Because someday, we may be the old married couple sitting in a restaurant without our family along, tending to the other because one of us isn’t capable.   

When we arrived home, I tearfully asked my husband if he had seen them.   Yes, he had noticed them and he had one observation to make, “That’s what marriage is all about.”

On that best day of the year which started out so poorly, I was reminded why it’s important for me to remember love –  true honest to goodness love that lasts a lifetime for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish until death do us part. 

And I thank God for the lesson I learned. Thank you for this day.

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

  

All points bulletin: Empty Nesters

Dear Mama’s Empty Nest Readers,

Today’s post is a special request and I’m hoping you can help me out with this one. It’s an APB!  Yep, that’s what I said!  An APB (all points bulletin) for empty nesters!

I’ve been contacted by a researcher from the Steve Harvey Show in Chicago.  The show is looking for families who are soon entering the empty nest stage of life for a segment on the show.

If your last child is graduating from high school and you are facing the empty nest or know friends or family members who are and would be willing to be contacted by the show, please contact Ryan Porter at this email address:  ryan.porter@steveharveytv.com

Oh, and did I say he needs help with this one immediately?!  He’s on a deadline and if you contact him, he will be one happy camper!

If you want more information on Steve Harvey’s talk show, click here for the official website.

Thank you!!

Sincerely,

Mama’s Empty Nest

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

Wordless Wednesday: what is it?

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

Color challenged

A tribute to colorful ROYGBIV

Red door at my church

Mmm…hot tea in an orange cup!

Yellow wreath on my front door

Green chair where I chat with hubby in his office

Blue quilt handmade by my mother

Indigo dress reminding me of our 3 weddings

Violet crocus reminding me color is on its way!

Color, color, I need color!!

The French impressionist artist Claude Monet once claimed, “Color is my day-long obsession, joy and torment.”

I am certainly not an artist, but during this time of year I do profess an obsession for color.  And while it provides cheer and much joy for me, it sure doesn’t torment me like it did Monet; I’m simply satisfied to view it.

I’ve written often of my desire for color in my world. Especially after a long, bleak winter, I find myself yearning for spots of vibrancy before my eyes.  I often joke that I feel color-deficient during this time of dormancy.

So when color erupts in the view from my window, my heart sings.  And I may break out in a song or too out loud also! So this week’s Word Press Photo Challenge elated me – Color!

Color proves a tad slow in showing its glorious face outside, so I searched inside and outside my home to shoot these photos.  Each shot I chose to personify this challenge is meaningful to me as well. Hover over each picture to read the caption and you’ll learn why.

I also decided to shoot each color attributed to the rainbow.  So here’s my tribute to  ROYGBIV – red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet.  Let there be color….and let it be SOON!

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

Wordless Wednesday: Spring’s sprung!

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

Speed kills

Some days I think we’re all just like hamsters.

We jump on that little wheel and run, run, run but don’t really get anywhere.

It seems the world keeps spinning faster and faster and I find myself wanting to just jump off.

The speed of life keeps increasing when all I want to do is slow down.

“There is more to life than increasing its speed.” ~Mohandas Gandhi

Case in point.  I live in a rural area outside of a very small town.  You would think that life in these parts would be lived at a slower pace.  We’re less than an hour away from a large city, but our roads aren’t too congested with traffic.

But drive on any of our area roads – either the four-lane highway, two-lane roads, or even our back country roads – and someone is pushing you along from behind, tail-gating you even when you’re driving the speed limit or higher.   Cars zoom past even when there are no safe passing zones.

On my way to work,  my quickest route is a highway.  Each day, cars whip by me in the passing lane like I’m standing still.  Don’t they know that speed kills?

Just recently, three car accidents resulted on one stretch of that highway in one week’s time.  Now we have had more than our share of wintry, snowy, icy weather, but that particular week, the weather was warmer, there was no rain/sleet/snow and the sun was actually shining.

So the accidents could not have been blamed on weather conditions.  And they couldn’t even be blamed on other inattentive drivers because all three crashes were one-vehicle incidents.

One was a pick-up truck that was literally smashed on all sides and all of the air-bags were blown out.  How on earth did that person cause a one-vehicle accident like that on a straight stretch of a four-lane highway with very little traffic (and no dead deer in sight either)?

I have to believe it was speeding.

So that got me to thinking.  Speed kills.  Not just literally by driving too fast on the highway, but in other areas of our lives as well.

We used to communicate by spending time together in meaningful conversations.  Now we send short and immediate text messages instead.

We used to put our thoughts down with pen on paper, sign our name, address an envelope, and send our loved ones and friends a letter.  Now we dust off a quick email and it instantaneously arrives in their virtual mailbox.

We used to wait for the newspaper to be delivered to our home to read about the latest news.  Now we just log into our computers and scan what latest items some web site deems newsworthy or check everyone’s statuses on Facebook or Twitter or other social media.

We want everything faster and immediately from our food to our health test results.  And we want it now!  I’ve fallen into this speed trap more times than I’d like to confess.

Hubby and I were out for dinner one evening and our waitress was a tad slow in taking our order, then we waited quite a while for our food to arrive.  I started to complain out loud to my husband, but caught myself and stopped.

But I could tell hubby was getting agitated.  So I asked him, “Why are we in such a big hurry? We’re just going home after this.”

And it was true.  We weren’t in a time-crunch.  We had nowhere to arrive on time.  Nothing to hurry for.  So why was the wait so unbearable?

The truth is, it wasn’t.  As we gulp our food and rush off to wherever we think we have to be, we’re forgotten how to be patient.  We’ve lost the art of slowing down and truly enjoying life.

“Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.”  ~Will Rogers

When I was a kid there was a popular saying, “Stop the world, I want to get off!”  Sometimes I feel just like that.  Stop the rat race, I don’t want to run it.  Stop the sprint, I want a marathon.

Slow down.  That’s what I want to do. Slow down and enjoy the beauty of God’s creation.  Slow down and spend time in actual conversations with those I love.  Slow down and enjoy a leisurely stroll through the park. Slow down and enjoy this life I’ve been given.

And just to confirm that my thoughts were on target, I received this email from an acquaintance that I don’t see very often any more.  Earlier in the week, I had suggested we get together soon to catch up with how life’s treating us.  Her response was, ‘Yes, let’s get together!  Life is too short not to make time.”

So today, on this best day of the year, I’m reminding myself that speed really does kill.  It kills patience, it kills conversations, it even can kill friendships.

“Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you’ve been, but also where you are going.  Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way.” ~ Nancy Simms

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

  

A Day in My Life

This week’s Word Press Photo Challenge is to capture a day in your life with photos.  Every one of us has some days that are busy from dawn to dusk and chock full of exciting events.  Other days may seem hum-drum, mundane, the same old same old.

But that’s life.  Some days I awaken with a great sense of wanting to accomplish so much and I embrace the day like this quote from writer E.B.White:  “I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.”

And often times I live my day just like the actor Cary Grant once said of his own life: “My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can.”

But every day of life we’re given can be the best day of the year.  It’s all about the attitude we choose to have for each day as it comes.

So I’ve chosen to symbolize a typical day in the life of Mama’s Empty Nest – a work day with not much excitement.  Just an average, regular day.  But even average, regular days are days for which to be grateful.

P.S. Hover your mouse over each photo below to read the captions.

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com



Hot tea to start the day

Driving to work

At my desk

Any birds outside the office?

Lunch options — here?

Or here?

Lunchtime!

Homeward bound in snow flurries!

Mail in the box

She can’t wait to get inside!

Evening at church

Day is done

Wordless Wednesday: Finally!

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

The Easter egg legacy

Happy Easter!  Yes, I know.  Easter is over.   I haven’t forgotten.

I might be a tad forgetful from time to time, but I do manage to remember the important stuff. 

And for me, Easter is important.  But just because the actual day is over, doesn’t mean I can’t continue to celebrate it.

“May you never forget what is worth remembering, nor ever remember what is best forgotten.” ~ an Irish blessing

One of the ways I celebrate this holy holiday is to continue remembering.  I remember the amazing gift my Savior provided for me on the cross.  I remember  He arose from the tomb defeating death and because of that, my real home isn’t here on this temporal earth, it’s somewhere eternal.

And this Easter, I remembered Easters in the past.  Maybe it’s true what Mark Twain said about life when he made this comment:  “What is human life?  The first third, a good time; the rest, remembering about it.”

I find myself spending quite a chunk of time now days remembering.  Maybe it’s that empty nest syndrome.  Maybe it’s because holidays are so different now than they were when I was a kid or when my children weren’t all grown up, married, and off on their own.

Or maybe it’s just my age.  Regardless, I remember.  Papa and I spent this Easter weekend with middle daughter and son-in-law in the state to the south of us.  And while it was a different Easter, it was wonderful and we enjoyed being with them for the weekend.

But I found myself remembering these things:  Easter when I was a little girl with white gloves and an Easter bonnet.   The smell of Easter lilies and hyacinths. 

 My own little girls decked out in frilly dresses, fancy socks, and brand new Easter shoes and son in Easter finery, little boy style. Easter baskets, laden with goodies and always a white chocolate cross, and egg hunts. 

Back then, we celebrated the Resurrection at Sunrise services and in worship.   Easter was a busy day full of good times, special services, and big home cooked meals.  Often because we lived several hours and many miles from our families, we celebrated the day with good friends.

When we lived in the Midwest, our church family became our family and we were very close to them.  One family in particular became our best friends.  We loved them and their three teenage daughters who became our children’s baby-sitters.  We spent much time at each other’s homes enjoying good company, good friendship, and good food and celebrated some Easters together.

During our eight years living in Kansas City, I remember receiving special delivery packages sent to us from my husband’s parents back in our home state.  The box was filled with candy Easter eggs, lovingly handmade with delicious creamy centers, dipped in chocolate, and wrapped in different colors of foil to connote each flavor – butter cream, coconut, peanut butter, chocolate, cherry, and mint.

The tasty concoctions were made by my in-laws’ church and sold as a fund-raiser for many years.  My children’s grandparents actively helped make thousands and thousands of these eggs which made the treats even more special. 

The recipes for the creamy egg centers were a closely guarded secret, but my mother-in-law received permission to share them with me, so I could give them to our Midwest church ladies fellowship group.  Our intent was to make eggs as our own fundraiser for special mission projects.

But before I could get involved in the egg-making fundraiser, my husband received a job transfer and our family was on our way to the Pacific Northwest to live.  There would be no candy egg making for me. 

Furthermore, there would be no more of those special candy Easter eggs for our family. Shortly after we moved to our new home on the West Coast, my father-in-law passed away and my mother-in-law moved to a new community to be closer to family.  She attended a different church there, so the special Easter egg deliveries to our home stopped.

But I’ve always remembered those specially made Easter eggs. That’s why the box I found in my mailbox just a few days before Easter was such an amazing surprise. 

It was postmarked from our old Kansas City suburb and the return address showed the package was from our dear friends there.  When I opened the box, I laughed out loud with delight!

An egg carton, filled with one dozen chocolate covered Easter eggs, lovingly made by hand by the Ladies Fellowship in the little Kansas City area church we so loved,  nestled inside that box.  

Yummy Easter eggs with butter cream, coconut, peanut butter, chocolate, cherry, and mint fillings!

As I cut open one and savored a bite of the creamy coconut filling, I paused to remember.  I remembered with love my wonderful mother-in-law, who left this earth 15 years ago.  And I remembered her gracious sharing of this Easter egg legacy with not just us, her family, but with our church half a country away from her. 

As I took another bite, I remembered with love and thanksgiving the enduring friendship we’ve sustained with our Midwestern friends.  Those friends have continued the Easter egg legacy there at our former church for 21 years, if I figured the math correctly.

On this best day of the year, I’m enjoying my satisfying Easter remembrances.  I fondly reminisce about beloved family and cherished friends while I taste a little chocolate covered egg, and a scripture comes to my mind.

“I thank my God every time I remember you.” ~  Philippians 1:3

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

He is risen indeed

Have a Blessed Resurrection Day.  Happy Easter from Mama’s Empty Nest.