“If the family were a fruit, it would be an orange, a circle of sections, held together but separable – each segment distinct.”  ~Letty Cottin Pogrebin

I always assumed my family was a little fruity, so the quote above gives credence to that. 

If you are a regular reader of Mama’s Empty Nest, you will notice that I write often about family – my circle of orange sections – and how much it means to me. 

I really have two families.  First is my actual family – my husband, adult children and their spouses, and sisters and their respective families.  Then there is my church family which includes folks who have known me my entire life.

I just recently realized that I have another family though.  My WordPress Family.  Oh, they’re spread out all over the country and I’ve only met them through blogging, but they feel like family to me because we have a connection with each other.  We share ideas, encouragement, comments, pictures, and thoughts.  And isn’t that what a family does?

“Cherish your human connections – your relationships with friends and family.” ~ Barbara Bush

One of my blogging family connections is Dor from Virginia Views.  That gal is witty and she makes me laugh – out loud!  She and I have been swapping stories and commonalities for quite some time now and even though we’ve never met in person, I consider her an important segment in my orange writing and reading circle.

Not too long ago, Dor bestowed a blogging award honor on me and my humble little blog.  Maybe it’s just the title that struck a chord with me or maybe it’s the description of the award, but this one seems most special.

It’s called the WordPress Family Award and here’s how Dor depicted it: “The WordPress Family Award is reserved for folks in Cyberspace who are unceasingly kind, sympathetic, encouraging, and open to laughter – and who keep each other going by sharing, commenting, and making personal connections even though they may actually be virtual strangers.”

This world is chock full of strangers and albeit, some of them are very strange.  I find it somehow comforting to find like-minded writers out there who share some kind of bond with me even though we’ve not met.

“The family is a haven in a heartless world.”  ~Attributed to Christopher Lasch

To me, this world is a very heartless place sometimes, which is why I do believe one’s family is a haven.  And that’s why I enjoy my blogging family as well.  They provide a safe harbor for me while I float out there in the wide world of words.

I gratefully accept this award and thank Dor so much for naming me. 

The WordPress Family Award Rules:

1. Display the award logo on your blog.
2. Link back to the person who nominated you.  (My blogging buddy Dor is a vital member of my orange  blogging family!  You can visit her at Virginia Views.)
3. Nominate 10 others you see as having an impact on your WordPress experience and family. (The following 10 bloggers have been like family to me.  Most of them do not participate in these awards, and some of them do not post as often as they used to, but they’ve been my writing family from early on in my blogging world.  They’ve encouraged me through their friendships,  comments and even emails and they’re all very special to me.  But my family is growing and there are so many other blogs I enjoy reading and I’m getting to know some of those writers as well.  So please don’t feel like the black sheep of the family if you are not included in this list! )

• Homestead Ramblings
• Saturday Evening Porch
• These Days of Mine
• Georgette Sullins Blog
• Writing for Daisies
• Living in Graceland
• Coming East
• Montana Outdoors
• Big Happy Nothing
• Life Upside Down

4. Let your 10 WordPress Family members know you have awarded them.

And now, on this best day of the year, I have this sudden hankering for a nice juicy orange and I’m pretty certain I’ll savor each segment. 

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

  ©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

I recently enjoyed viewing wedding photos from the faraway wedding of a friend’s son.  

I don’t know the bride but I could just tell from the photos that she’s got personality.

You know what I mean.  Personality just oozes from some people.  They’re just like the old song from the 50’s, (You’ve Got) Personality.

Listen here if you don’t know this song:.

People with personality are…well, they are all personality.

Borrowing the lyrics from that old song, they:

“Walk, personality
Talk, personality
Smile, personality
Charm, personality
Love, personality.”

Years ago, I took a personality test just to see how my temperament would be assessed. You can find these tests online if you want to check out your own disposition.

Upon finishing the questions, you learn your personality type which depends on how you answer questions in four basic categories.  If you tend to focus on the outer world, you’re rated E for Extraversion.  If you instead prefer to concentrate on your own inner world, you get an I for Introversion.

The way you process information is also assessed.  You are either Sensing (S) because you tend to focus on the basic information you take in or you like to interpret information and add meaning to it.  That earns you an N for Intuition.

The next category rates how you make decisions.  If you make choices using logic and consistency, a T for Thinking is added to your determination.   But if you consider people and special circumstances when you make decisions, you get the F label for Feeling.

How you deal with the outside world is also evaluated.  If you prefer to get things decided, you are in the Judging (J) type (note that doesn’t necessarily mean judgmental, it just means you access things and make up your mind) or if you stay open to new information and options, you get a P for Perceiving.

While cleaning out some desk drawers and files, I found my old personality test from many years ago.  If the test can be believed, it categorized me as ESFJ, being extraverted, sensing, feeling and judging.

This personality type was described in the following way:  “ESFJ type = you are warmhearted, conscientious, and cooperative.  You want harmony in your environment, and you work with determination to establish it.  You like to work with others to complete tasks accurately and on time. You are loyal and follow through even in small matters. You notice what others need in their day-by-day lives and you try to provide it.  You want to be appreciated for who you are and for what you contribute.”

As I read that, for the most part I agreed with it all.  Yes, I thought, it does sound like me.

But just for kicks, I decided I would take another personality test online and see whether the same results ensued.  I didn’t expect the outcome, which caused me to ponder a bit.  I don’t necessarily take great stock in these things, but still it made me wonder.

Because according to the recent test, I’ve changed my personality type.  Huh?  Does one do that?  I always thought your basic personality or temperament or whatever you want to call it remained the same during your lifetime.  I thought you were born that way and so, you died that way too.

However, if I am to believe that the recent test I took is accurate, I’ve undergone a personality change!

This time I was categorized as INFJ.  The first two categories changed from extrovert to introvert, from sensing to intuitive.   This is how my current personality was described:  “INFJ = you seek meaning and connection in ideas, relationships, and material possessions. You want to understand what motivates people and are insightful about others. You are conscientious and committed to your firm values. You develop a clear vision about how best to serve the common good.  You are organized and decisive in implementing your vision.”

Hmmm.  I can see where some of that description is fitting for me but some of it seems way off base, especially that finding meaning in material possessions thing.  I asked my husband, who has known me for my entire adult life, if he thought my personality has changed.

He hesitated as he thought it over, and then answered that there have been some changes.  I used to be more outgoing and talkative.  Now, I tend to listen more and talk less and seem more reserved.  At least that’s what he thought.

So here’s what I gleaned from all of this.  When I took a personality test the first go-round, I was much younger and a nurturing stay at home mother with three children and a husband who traveled a lot for his career. 

No wonder I desired “harmony in my environment,” noticed what “others need in their day-by-day lives,” and tried to provide it.  It also explains why I wanted to be “appreciated” for who I was and for what I “contributed.”

Makes perfect sense to me.  But now, I am an older, and hopefully wiser, empty nest mom/wife who views life from an entirely different perspective.  That’s why I “seek meaning and connection” in ideas and relationships.  I am committed to my “firm values” and I do think I’ve learned to be more insightful about people.

So does personality change with age?  Or does it change because of our perspective?  Do our circumstances alter personality?  Or is it just that we answer the questions differently in various stages of life? What do you think?  I’m truly interested in your opinion on this subject.

I do know one thing for certain.  On this best day of the year, I DO have personality. (Just look at that picture of me above!)  Whether it’s changed or not, I know that I’m also just like Popeye the Sailor Man, “I yam what I yam!”

 ©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

]]> http://mamasemptynest.wordpress.com/2013/05/07/personality-plus/feed/ 6 mamasemptynest blog195 http://mamasemptynest.wordpress.com/2013/05/02/a-moment-in-time/ http://mamasemptynest.wordpress.com/2013/05/02/a-moment-in-time/#comments Thu, 02 May 2013 13:00:44 +0000 Mama's Empty Nest http://mamasemptynest.wordpress.com/?p=7807 Keep reading →]]>

It’s my busy season at work.  I tend to get stretched a little too far and wound a little too tight this time of year as I maneuver my way into the hope of rest and relaxation in the upcoming summer months.

So I find myself looking ahead much like this quote attributed to cartoonist Bill Watterson, the guy who draws the lovable Calvin & Hobbes comic strip:  “We’re so busy watching out for what’s just ahead of us that we don’t take time to enjoy where we are.” 

I suppose taking the time to enjoy where we are could be called living in the best moment.  Well, one of those best moments happened along my way recently. 

Even though I’ve been a little derelict in blogging lately because of time restraints, I’ve managed to attract some new readers.  And if you’re one of those delightful people who clicked the follow button, thank you for joining me and my world here at Mama’s Empty Nest.  I hope you find something worthwhile to read, enjoy, or maybe even inspire you here – maybe even your own little moment in time.

One of those new readers is  A Blessed Pilgrim, at His Eye Is On the Sparrow.   I haven’t had a tremendous amount of time to spend perusing  her posts, but what I have read makes me desirous for more.  Her blog title and tag line – “Because without Him, I’m challenged! Finding hope in hopelessness” – touches my heart.

On one of my harried days in the middle of a hectic week, I quickly logged into my blog to find some new comments waiting for my approval.  One of them was from Blessed Pilgrim alerting me that she had nominated my blog for not just one but two awards – the “Best Moment Award” and the “Liebster Blog Award.”

Now I know not everyone appreciates these awards, but when a reader takes the time to notice my blog and give me this gift of letting others know about me, I want to thank that person and show my appreciation.  I’ve received the Liebster award previously, so I’m going to pass on it, except to thank Blessed Pilgrim for sending it my way again. 

The Best Moment Award caught my eye because I haven’t seen it before.  So I clicked on Blessed Pilgrim’s blog post in order to read more about this honor.  As I read her words, they brightened my day. 

Here’s what she wrote:  “Blogger awards are a good kind of chain letter.  They are to bless the nominated blogger who gets them, and bless those they recommend.  Unlike chain letters, there is no evil curse at the end if one doesn’t follow through.  Thank heavens; there is enough bad stuff out there.  They are kind of like the Halloween Trick-or-Treat without the Trick.” 

I liked that!  Of course, I’m all about treats!

So please, go visit Blessed Pilgrim’s blog and indulge me as I follow the rules for the Best Moment Award: 1)Placing the award on your blog (lined up on my Awards Page); 2)Answer a few questions (giving you some insight into what makes me tick); and 3)Nominate some of your favorite bloggers (there are so many, so please don’t feel slighted if I missed you).

Best Moment Award Questions:

Who inspires you?  I’d say first of all, the Lord God inspires me.  Everywhere I look, I see His handiwork…in nature, in people, in the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and touches I experience.  How could all of those things created by Him not inspire me?  Next, I would say so many of my fellow bloggers inspire me with their words, their pictures, their thoughts, and their encouragement.

What is the hardest part about blogging, if any? For me, it’s finding enough time to develop all of the many, many ideas zooming around in my brain and jotted down in my notebook.

What is your favorite quote? Oh my, that’s difficult since I am a keeper of quotes.  I love so many, but I’m going to go with a simple one.  “Just keep swimming.” ~ by Dory the Fish in Finding Nemo (Surprised you with that one, huh?)

What is your favorite dessert?  I love chocolate but when it comes to having an evening dessert, chocolate keeps me awake at night! So my favorite dessert is a really good lemon meringue pie or maybe key lime. Yum.

What skill do you wish you had taken the time to learn when you were growing up? Learning how to cook and bake like my mother.  I still haven’t managed to make a good pie crust like she did. 

What is the one activity you wish you had the time to pursue? Photography.  I love taking photos especially with my new camera and if I had a little more free time, I’d read my camera’s instruction book cover to cover to really understand all of its features and maybe even take a photography class.  Ah, maybe I can carve out some time this summer for this pursuit.

If money was no issue, where would you like to travel? I’d do a grand tour of Europe with extra time spent in England where a great many of my ancestors came from.  And then I think I’d journey to Australia.

What is your favorite holiday? Hands down, it’s Christmas.  I love every single thing about it. The decorating, the food, the greetings, the gifting, the music, and most of all, the remembrance of the greatest gift ever given to mankind.

What is your favorite pastime?  I work crossword puzzles almost every day.  I find it helps my memory and keeps my mind sharper, plus I’m compulsive enough to want to finish each one completely.

What book are you currently reading? I’m continually reading my Bible.  I’m also in the middle of a couple books about God’s grace.  And to throw a different flavor into the mix, I like to go back and re-read some classics.  Right now, it’s To Kill a Mockingbird.

Do you play a musical instrument?   As a young girl, I took piano lessons for several years, so I can play that instrument.  Am I good at it?  Well, let’s just say I enjoy my own little concerts by myself in my living room.

And now…drum roll please…these are my nominations for the Best Moment Award.  These bloggers always provide amazing fodder for my eyes either to read or see through their photographs. (Click on their blog names to visit them!)

Montana Outdoors 

These Days of Mine 

Living in Graceland  

Georgette Sullins Blog 

Virginia Views 

The two bloggers I’ve listed below don’t even know that I exist.  They are well-known and have thousands of followers and I am just one of them.  But I love what they write, and have found some best moments reading their blogs, and maybe you will too.

Ann Voskamp’s  A Holy Experience 

Angie Smith’s Bring the Rain 

On this best day of the year, whether you’re a blogger or just a blog reader, I hope you find some inspiration to live in your best moment.

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

The only plant to survive (so far) in my house because it’s fake!

I know a challenge when I’m given one.  My good blogging buddy, Dor over at Virginia Views recently confessed a deep, dark secret. 

She is an assassin….when it comes to indoor plants.

She put it out there in cyberspace for all the world to see that, yes, she is a killer of those lovely green things that are supposed to beautify our homes and purify our air all at the same time.

Well, what are friends for if not to commiserate, console, and confide in?  So I shared with her that I too lead a secret life slaying every green living foliage that is brought through my door.  

But not on purpose!  It just….happens.

Yes, I too lack a green thumb.  Mine just happens to be black.

Dor countered with a story about the time she killed her plastic rubber plant in this post. She wanted to know if I could top that one and so we’ve entered into a plant ‘fishing’ kind of contest.  You know when you tell how large that fish that got away was,  and your friend counters back with an even bigger fish tale (or is it tail?)?

So here goes. I’ve tried, oh Lord, I’ve tried to be an indoor plant gardener.   I come from a long line of plant nurturers.  My grandmother, my mother, even my mother-in-law all had a knack for growing lush green plants indoors.

My casualty list is long.  I killed a spider plant when I lived in an apartment by myself fresh out of college and embarking on my career.  After hubby and I tied the knot, I sought to beautify our home sweet home with all kinds of flora and items from the kingdom Plantae that could be grown indoors…ivies (Swedish or English, I’m not biased; they all became deadies), a jade plant which turned into a mold plant, and since we lived in the Southwest where cacti abound, I even purchased a cactus.

Yes, it’s true.  I slayed the cactus.  Hard to do, I would think, but I managed it.

I distinctly remember being at my dentist office once and noticing a very unusual plant there.  The hygienist told me it was called a ‘pregnant plant’ because a bunch of little baby seeds hung off the leaves of the plant.  She said it was oh, so easy to grow and knocked a few of the babies off into a Styrofoam cup for me to take home.

I buried those new babies in potting soil, talked to them, encouraged them to grow, and surprisingly they did for awhile.  My in-laws came for a visit and my mom-in-law asked me about this plant she’d never seen before.  I told her its story, knocked a few babies off for her, which she wrapped in a dampened paper towel, placed in a plastic ziplock bag, and packed in her luggage for her flight home.

My pregnant plant survived but never really got any larger, but I figured it would just take time, right?  At least a year later, hubby and I traveled back to our home state to visit our families. 

You guessed it, didn’t you?  When we went to his parents’ house, there was this massive pregnant plant, all healthy and producing babies like a rabbit.  And while we were away, my puny plant which had never grown any bigger gave up the ghost.

So my tales of plant woe are many.  I’ve massacred them all.  Just last year, I managed to totally annihilate a beautiful hibiscus plant that stood over 6 feet tall.  Its previous little self once belonged to me, a gift from our home builder when we moved in our new house in Kansas City.  It never grew much, but I managed to keep it alive, just barely.

When we transferred to the Pacific Northwest, I knew it would not survive several days in a hot, loaded moving truck, and since we were traveling to our new home by plane, I couldn’t take it with us.  So I bequeathed it to my mom.  

At her home and under her green thumb, it grew and it grew and it grew.  The most exquisite red flowers bloomed on that plant and each time we traveled home to visit, I marveled at how much it thrived under my mom’s care.

After my mom passed away, the care of this hardy plant fell on my father.  He kept it alive, blooming and growing even more.  That hibiscus was 20 years old when my dad passed and the plant came to live with us.  It shriveled up, it dropped leaves, it browned and withered, and finally it was no more.

Ol’ Black Thumb strikes again!  It’s a true fact that everyone in my family knows to never ever ever give the gift of plants to me because they will soon find their way into the compost pile out in the yard.

Dropping leaves – makes it look real, huh?

Like Dor, over the years, I resorted to buying plastic and silk plants, but they too have somehow been destroyed (I tend to blame the cat) except for one. 

A plastic ficus tree still stands in its corner of our dining room adding a bit of green to our home.

But over the years, I’ve noticed a few leaves here and there have fallen off.  Could it be, just like Dor, I even kill fake plants??

Could be.  Matter of fact, it does look a little droopy.  I just try to ignore it and let those fallen leaves lay in the tree’s basket because it looks more real that way, don’t you think?

But it’s still standing, so for now Dor, I concede the Grand Plant Slayer title to you, oh killer of plastic plants.

 ©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

What goes up must come down.  Or so the song lyrics say.

My first thought when I saw the Word Press weekly photo challenge “Up” was to take photos of the sky.  I mean how much farther up can you see than the sky when you’re standing on the ground and gravity is holding you down?

But the sky in my neck of the woods didn’t cooperate so well this week.  Every time I looked up, I saw cranky old gray skies or raindrops kept falling on my head and chasing me indoors.

So I headed back to my picture file on the laptop.  Searching through shots I’d already taken, I came across some photos I captured on a trip to the Deep South a couple of years ago. 

Our oldest daughter lived in Birmingham, Alabama for several years.  One fall, hubby and I took a road trip to visit her and the three of us visited the US Space and Rocket Center in Huntsville.

The center proved an intriguing place for my ex-military husband and science minded daughter, but I truly enjoyed it as well and I took a ton of photographs.  I think a few of them symbolize the concept of ‘up’ quite nicely.  But I’ll let you be the judge.

Things certainly were looking ‘up’ when we got there!

Hubby and daughter got on this contraption that took them up – way up!

Daughter is looking up and Mama is relieved this was securely held up!

©2013 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com