We all shine on like the moon, and the stars, and the sun

Do you ever wonder where inspiration really comes from?

Sometimes our temporal lives seem so mundane.  We get up, we go to work, and we come home.  In between we eat, talk, complete the necessary aspects of life that need attended to, and sleep.

We find entertainment and escape from the drudgery of toil in different ways.  For some, it’s opening up a good book (or their Kindle).  For others, it’s mindlessly watching television or videos.  For yet others, it’s whiling away hours on the laptop playing games.

But that kind of life leaves us feeling empty, I think.  And I must confess I can easily fall into this same trap of dull, routine tedium.

Life has been busy and full in Mama’s Empty Nest as most of you regular readers know.  But even with all the activity, monotony occasionally sets in.  And when it does, it causes me to ponder what will happen when all the hustle and bustle dies down.  Because it most surely will.  Just as morning follows night.  As the sun rises, so does it set.

In between all the moments of joy the last few months, I’ve encountered sober moments as well.  Yesterday was one of those days.  I shed tears of sympathy and grief with a friend who recently and unexpectedly lost her husband.  I listened as she shared her struggles in dealing with his death, changes that are taking place in her life, and huge decisions she is facing.  And I cried with and for her.

Later in the day, my feelings got hurt by someone dear to me and that brought me close to tears. I realized I was being overly sensitive, no doubt due to the melancholy atmosphere of my day.  But then, as I examined my thought processes, another reality of life slammed into me producing tears yet again.

Our first child is getting married last in the queue of family weddings.  And while that brings me exquisite joy, it will be a bittersweet time for my husband and me.

Last year, she moved from the Deep South back to our home state with a new job in our nearest city.  What joy that brought to our hearts to have her near home once again!

She lived in an apartment in the city with her sister, our middle daughter, until that daughter got married and the lease was up for the place.  Since oldest daughter’s plans for life after marriage weren’t finalized yet, she moved back home with Mama and Papa temporarily about a month after her sister married and moved to the state just south of us.

But now, with her upcoming marriage, oldest daughter will once again move away.  She and her fiancé will commence their united life in his home state, about a seven hour drive away from our home nest.

With that reality, middle daughter and son-in-law living a couple hours from here,  and knowing son and his bride-to-be also will live several hours away in a different direction, it’s like going through those old empty nest feelings all over again.  The thought of all my children (all six of them!) scattered away from our home dampened this mama’s day and threatened to drown my joyful heart.

I retired for the night feeling tired, emotion-filled, and weary.   When I awoke this morning, crisp, cool fall-like air wafted through our open bedroom windows.  Bright sunshine flooded the room as I opened the blinds.  Birds sang their happy tunes and I heard the whoosh of school bus brakes as it stopped to pick up neighborhood children.

The promise of a beautiful day showed itself and I had the day off work.  Still a hint of gloominess grasped my thoughts.   I stumbled down the stairs with a basketful of towels to launder, threw them in the washer, and placed a full tea kettle on the stove for a steaming hot cup of tea.

While waiting for the familiar whistle of the kettle, I washed a few stray travel cups that were left in the kitchen sink from yesterday.  I glanced outside my kitchen window and that’s when I saw it.

I stared at it again, perplexed.  I tilted my head, changed my location and viewpoint,  and scrutinized the sight again.   And that’s when I grabbed my camera and inspiration washed over me.

Not just any inspiration,  God-inspired encouragement.  This scripture resonated in my mind:  “When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them?”  ~ Psalm 8:2-4

 As I stepped into the cool, dewy wet grass of my back yard with the warmth of glorious sunshine radiating on my back, I snapped a picture of something that wasn’t there yesterday or I just had not noticed it in my gloomy frame of mind.

And I knew in my heart that this sign was God telling me He knows my heart, He knows my fears, He knows my mother’s heartache and joy, and He cares.  And He will fill my empty nest with His love, His goodness, His mercy.

Martin Luther wrote, “God writes the Gospel not in the Bible alone, but also on trees, and in the flowers and clouds and stars.”  

I found that statement to be most true today in yet another chapter of my life’s book of opportunity.  It was as if God displayed His Word written right in front of my eyes this morning.  So what did I see?

An inspiration star is born.

It might seem ordinary to some, but not to me.  For about a week, I’ve noticed tent worms had spun their cobweb-like wispy ‘tent’ on a tree bordering our property.

This tent spread out willy-nilly with no defining shape to it whatsoever….until this morning.

This morning that previously shapeless tent was formed into a star (click on my photo at left to enlarge).

A star with a message to me from my Father God.  “Shine on, my daughter, shine on.  I will always be with you even in your empty nest.”

“What is the good of your stars and trees, your sunrise and the wind, if they do not enter into our daily lives?” ~ E. M. Forster

Copyright ©2012 mamasemptynestwordpress.com

This monkey is not my imaginary friend

We’ve all heard of the proverbial “monkey on your back,” but have you ever heard of a monkey that has your back?  Maybe one who is like the primate in this commercial from a couple of years ago:

From time to time, I think every one of us humans feels like we have a  monkey on our backs, something that just seems to be a constant burden.  Sometimes we just can’t figure out how to get away from that problem that weighs us down.  Some of us can’t cope with an affliction that is just too difficult a load to carry by ourselves.

That’s where the monkey that has your back can help.

A few weekends ago, I attended a Women of Faith Imagine conference with one of my best friends, my life-long gal pal, Annie.  I’ve written about her often and if you’re a regular follower of my blog, you’ve read about her before here.

Annie asked me a couple of months ago to attend the uplifting weekend of worship and encouragement with her and since I’ve never attended Women of Faith before, but always heard awesome things about it, I jumped at the opportunity to go.

My friend doesn’t live close to me, so we decided to stay overnight in a fancy, schmancy hotel near the arena where the conference was to be held instead of driving back and forth from the city.  It promised to be a lot of fun, two old friends having a pajama party, just like all those nights we stayed at each other’s houses in our youth.  We both were eager and excited when Annie swung by my house early Friday morning to pick me up for our drive into the city.

Friday morning’s sessions didn’t disappoint us.  The first speaker was Sheila Walsh, a beautiful person with a beautiful voice and message.   My pen flew across my notebook as I jotted down key points I wanted to remember.  Listening to her sing “How Great Thou Art” was simply like hearing an angel – really, she gave me goosebumps.

Next up on the agenda, psychologist Dr. Henry Cloud asked us to imagine a place where we’d find happiness.   Again my pen scurried across the open pages of my notebook.  I nodded in complete agreement when he stated, “Only 10% of your happiness comes from circumstances.”

He imparted much truth to us from God’s Word and the wisdom God has granted him about letting go of the past, making necessary endings to reach our tomorrows, and about pruning areas of our lives.  All of it was great stuff, so insightful and meaningful.

He declared that happy people are connected.  Whoa, that hit home.  I find myself writing a good deal about connections here in my blog and thinking about connections even more.  I realized a long time ago that connections do bring me happiness, especially my real connection, my relationship with my Savior Jesus Christ.

Dr. Cloud also relayed a story that will stick with me for a very long time.  The monkey story.  (“Aha, there’s the connection!” you’re probably thinking.)

It seems that if you put a single monkey in a cage and bombard it with loud, annoying noises that startle the animal repeatedly and unexpectedly and shake its cage violently, you could frighten a monkey to death.  I imagine the poor thing’s heart rate would rapidly accelerate, blood pressure would rise, and a sense of panic and alarm would overwhelm the creature.

Sounds like everyday life to some of us humans!  But, according to Cloud, research reveals that if you put another monkey in the cage with the first one, continue the noises and frightening occurrences, both monkeys will survive and not be as greatly affected by the disturbances.  Two monkeys will help one another cope, protect one another, support each other.

We need one another, just like those monkeys did, to get through our trials and burdens of life.  So,  Cloud instructed an arena of 8,000 women to  “Go find yourself a  monkey!”

If we were at the event with a good friend, he told us to look at her and say, “You’re my monkey!”  Well, that initiated Annie’s and my theme for the weekend.  I glanced at her,  she turned to me, and we both laughed out loud and exclaimed, “You’re my monkey!”  And you guessed it, all weekend we called each other “my monkey.”

The rest of the weekend was great – amazing music by Natalie Grant, Mary, Mary, and WOF worship team.  We heard heartwarming talks from Lisa Harper, Nicole Johnson, Angie Smith, and Luci Swindoll.   So much good food for thought crammed into two days.

But the thing I’m going to remember?  Saturday afternoon, two older ladies we’d never seen before entered the arena after the break and sat down in our row.   Both Annie and I noticed them, looked at each other, and stifled giggles.  These two ladies each had a monkey hanging on them!

They proudly wore those long-armed, long-legged stuffed monkeys, the kind with the Velcro tabs in their hands, wrapped around their necks.  One lady had a bright pink monkey, the other gal had a lavender one.  We overheard them tell someone they had purchased their monkeys in their hotel gift shop.

I have never in my life tried so hard not to just break down in hysterical laughter.  And what made it even funnier?  My dearest friend, Annie, friend of my childhood, teenage years, and adulthood, turned to me and said, “I am NOT wearing a monkey around my neck for you!”

And that doesn’t matter because through thick and thin, youth and middle age, good times and bad, I know she has my back and I have hers.  And that’s something significant that contributes to our happiness – a true friend, one who sticks with you no matter what, is your confidante, and also your accountability partner for life.

And those friends, our “monkeys,” are gifts from God.   He sends us those people to come beside us and help us on our journey through this life.   Many of you fulfill that role for me, and I hope and pray I am one of those gifts for you.  I’m reminded on this 21^st page of Chapter 10 in my yearly book of Opportunity that God’s Word tells us two are better than one.

“There was a man all alone; he had neither son nor brother.  There was no end to his toil, yet his eyes were not content with his wealth.  ‘For whom am I toiling,’ he asked, ‘and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?’  This too is meaningless—a miserable business! Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor:  If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.  But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.” ~ Ecclesiastes 4:8-10

My prayer is that we all would have those people in our lives – those dear ones who listen when we struggle, offer encouragement to us in godly ways, and pray for us and with us as we endure the hardships of life.

Who is your monkey?

©2011 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

Changing the world

Working for a non-profit organization can be one of the most rewarding of jobs as well as discouraging at times.  I know because I’m employed by one.

Rewards flow abundantly when I witness first-hand how we make a difference in the lives of others.  But days of discouragement can also reign when I wonder if we’re truly gaining any ground.

I imagine that most of us who labor in the non-profit world do so not because of any personal gain but because we want to make the world a better place.  I know my fellow co-workers diligently strive to make such a change, to follow our passion for righting a wrong, to serve others, and introduce them to a more positive path for life.

When it comes to personality types, some of us non-profit employees are Doers, some of us are Relaters, and some of us are Influencers.  We may go about our work in diverse ways, but we have one thing in common.  We endeavor to actually accomplish our goals, we don’t just spout rhetoric.

“The world is blessed the most by men who do things, and not by those who merely talk about them.” ~ James Oliver

At times, our efforts seem overwhelming, even futile, and we need re-charged and refreshed to continue our tasks.  That’s exactly what occurred a short while ago at my place of employment.

Our Executive Director announced at weekly staff meeting one day that we should arrive at work on a particular Monday attired in comfortable clothes for a Staff Retreat Day.  She refused to give us details just reassured us that we would be treated to a surprise.  Our organization has undergone several major changes in the last two years, and as change sometimes can prove stressful and challenging, she and our Board of Directors wanted to thank us all for “hanging in there.”

On a crisp, sunny morning we gathered at the office and were whisked off to a lovely country house owned by a friend of our organization.  We settled down in her welcoming home and were served our choice of hot tea, special coffees, hot chocolate, or hot apple cider with several types of mini-muffins to munch on and of course, lots of chocolate candy.  While we sipped and unwound, a Board of Directors member encouraged us with an inspirational message and prayer.  A time of sharing insights about our co-workers’ strengths followed.

Our hostess, who definitely has the gift of hospitality, called us to her dining room where a beautifully decorated table greeted us and we enjoyed a delicious lunch.   But our retreat day wasn’t over yet!  Another friend of our organization, a professional massage therapist, joined us for our afternoon surprise.   Each staff member received a warm soak in a foot spa machine followed by a foot massage, then a back and neck massage, and finally a paraffin wax treatment for our hands.

And as the info-mercials say, “But wait, that’s not all!”  Savoring a delectable chocolate dessert and another hot beverage completed our day of pampering.  Our hostess with the ‘mostess’ presented us with a parting gift – a beautiful red apple sitting atop a small carton of caramel dip all dressed up in a pretty package.  As she randomly passed the treats out to us, she asked us to read a message tied to each one.   Somehow, each message, though different, fit each recipient.

I found my message, “You can change the world!”  interesting and apt, because that is what I attempt to do with the young people I’m privileged to see in schools….change their perspective, change their behavior, change their futures, change their lives in a positive way, one person at a time.

It’s the 29^th page in Chapter 9 in my book of Opportunity today.  This book (the year 2011) only has a few more chapters to go, then it will be finished and a new book will begin.   So today, I’ve been seriously contemplating that message I received on our day of pampered blessing and how it meshes with my year of opportunity.

I don’t want to be one of those people who just sits around talking about and waiting for the world to change.  God planted a desire in me to actively help transform people’s lives, which is exactly what I’ve done the last 10 years at my non-profit job.  But lately, I’ve wondered if it was time for me to move on to something else.  Now though, I’m sensing that the Lord doesn’t want me to stop just yet.

And I believe God doesn’t want me to stop sharing my faith journey with my readers.   Daniel 2:20-22 says: “Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are His.  He changes times and seasons; He deposes kings and raises up others. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning. He reveals deep and hidden things;  He knows what lies in darkness, and light dwells with Him.”

Only He can make a real change in me and you.   All we have to do is ask Him.   And then He equips us to go out and really change the world.

©2011 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

Fall surprises

Surprise!  That’s the nice way I started my morning today in my book of Opportunity, Page 23 in Chapter 9.

A blogging buddy of mine Georgette Sullins bestowed the Versatile Blogger Award on me.  Thank you for thinking of me!  Georgette and I became friends way back in April when she commented on my Freshly Pressed post, When Nature Shows No Mercy .   I find Georgette’s blog always fascinating as she chronicles endearing stories to be saved and cherished for her family.

Since this is the first time I’ve been honored with the Versatile Blogger Award, I researched it to find there are rules to follow.   So here goes:

Rule #1 – Thank the award-giver and link back to them in your post.   (As the kids would say, Georgette, you rock!)

Rule #2 – Tell your readers seven (7) things about yourself.  (Prepare yourself, dear readers, these are very random!)

1. I launched this blog on a whim, partly because of the weird funk I found myself in after my last child graduated from college, snagged a job, and moved to the state next door, and I also I thought I’d work through the empty nest syndrome by writing about it.  But this blog has morphed into more than just an empty nest activity.  Writing again has given me great joy and I’ve met some delightful friends through blogging.
2. Hubby and I come from families with ‘three of a kind’ (I’m one of three sisters; he’s one of three brothers).  But we were dealt a ‘pair and a spare.’   After our two daughters, our third child was a boy.  We were so certain we were having another girl, we didn’t even have a boy’s name chosen!  Sonograms weren’t very definitive back then.
3. When I was a young girl, I dreamed of being famous.  (What little girl doesn’t?)  At first, I thought I’d be a legendary actress, but later I decided I’d be a renowned writer.  Hmmm…so far, my only claim to ‘fame’ might be my one-time freshly pressed experience.
4. I’ve experimented with a few different careers – teacher, newspaper reporter/editor, technical editor, and in the last 10 years, working part-time for a non-profit.  But my absolute favorite occupation (and my most important one) has been motherhood. I was blessed to be a stay at home mom for 19 years!
5. My new found interest is photography – both taking pictures and looking at others’ beautiful shots.  I used to just click my camera to document special occasions, vacations, or my kids’ events.  Now, I grab it when I see something interesting or I just want to experiment.  I’m not very good at it, but I find it fun.
6. My perspective on life totally changed when I was diagnosed with early stage and very treatable cancer 6 years ago.  The whirlwind of diagnosis, surgery, and treatment left me dazed, but later so profoundly grateful for life and much more aware of the precious moments in it.
7. I don’t like seafood or coffee.  My husband loves both.

Rule #3 – Give this award to up to fifteen (15) recently discovered bloggers.

I’m veering from the rule here because my first award goes to a blog I’ve been reading for over a year now, so she’s not recently discovered, she’s one of my “must-reads” -  Homestead Rambling’s Blog.  We became instant and life-long friends when she found my blog and started commenting.  We’ve realized we are kindred spirits with so much in common, including our faith.  She truly is a versatile blogger because her posts may be informative, humorous, encouraging, or inspiring.  Right now, she’s writing about her recent journey to Alaska, a land that seems to be calling to her, and from her pictures, I can sure see why.

Crossing the Line  also deserves this award.  This blogging buddy has been one of my cheerleaders for some time.  Her comments always make me feel valued and appreciated as a writer.  I relish reading her posts on her relatively new blogging adventure.  As she honestly writes about the aspects of life that invite her to ‘cross the line’ and move forward on her personal growth journey, she reminds us all about our human frailties and how we can choose to take a different path.  She’s on my ‘must-read’ list too.

Rule #4 - Contact those bloggers and let them in on the exciting news.  (Boom, done, finished.  Emails complete.)

For now, I’m signing off.  My favorite season of fall arrives with some of my favorite people – the pair and the spare all will fly back to the nest this weekend!  We’ll have a full house with a family day Sunday.  That’s a gift that’s even better than a blogger award!

©2011 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

War of the clouds

This morning, I witnessed a battle scene.

The scene was so striking, it grabbed my attention and I could not take my eyes from it.   A dramatically painted picture  etched itself into my mind and didn’t leave my thoughts all day.

Summer time delivers many bright, sunny days of hot weather here at Mama’s Empty Nest.  In the last couple of days, some blessed rain blew in, shoving the high humidity out, resulting in more delightful temperatures and a sweet, refreshing breeze.

On my trek to work today,  I couldn’t stop staring at the sky.   As I buzzed down the highway, I noticed the fast-moving hedge of dark rain clouds streaking across the vista.   I continued watching them because they were speeding along like a freight train.

And that’s when I noticed that in one direction bits of fluffiness in the form of cottony clouds dotted blue sky and sunlight streamed through that part of the atmosphere.  But the sinister looking freight train was rolling through rapidly from the other direction!  The dark clouds, in their faster than a speeding bullet mode, collided and clashed with the bright side of the sky swiftly overtaking it  – simply annihilating it in the battle.

Those ominous clouds actually devoured the fleecy ones.   Darkness swallowed up the sunlight right before my eyes.   That scene unfolding in front of me reminded me about the stark reality of the world we live in.  Evil – the dark side, if you want to quote Star Wars – spreads its foul fingers wherever it goes trying to consume and ultimately destroy goodness or light.    And that happens each and every day here in our world, not just in movieland.

As a believer in Christ, I tend to view life in spiritual ways, especially when God paints such a vivid picture in my surroundings as He did this morning.   Witnessing those rain clouds slamming into sunshine reminded me that we need to be on guard, ever watchful for evil which can so easily overtake us.  But even more than that, we must be vigilant in prayer.

1 Peter 5:7-9  ~ “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.  Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.”

Just yesterday, I was gifted with an opportunity to enjoy a short chat with a lovely fellow Christian who I haven’t seen for some time.  She’s enduring a difficult trial right now, yet amid her own heavy load, she inquired about my family and shared that she had been praying for us. Her face lit up with a smile and praise when I revealed how her prayers had been answered.

Conviction washed over me as I realized that I have not been as diligent in prayer for this dear one as she has been for me.  She disclosed to me that during this storm she feels such a strong sense of peace which she’s certain is from God.  Then she stated something that didn’t surprise me at all.   Several well-meaning people in her circle of friends told her she wasn’t being positive enough because she has accepted the difficulty laid before her and is meeting it with complete faith and trust in the God who has saved her.

People don’t get that, she told me.  They think she’s not “thinking positive” when she tells them she will meet whatever outcome God has in store for her and they don’t understand or like what she says.  As a realist myself, I totally get it.

There are certain events we encounter in life that just happen.   You can try to use the ‘power of positive thinking’ until the cows come home, but it might not change your circumstances. That doesn’t mean you must stop asking God for intervention, or healing, or a miracle, or whatever may help the situation.  But you also should beseech Him for the strength to endure, the ability to completely trust His will for you, and the peace that passes all understanding.

That’s faith.

The power of positive thinking alone can’t move the rain clouds away or stop them from coming just as it can’t protect me from evil touching my life.   The power of prayer to the God who is in control of the universe is a different story.   And the power of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, God’s only Son, is the real source of the peace and strength needed to endure life as it comes.

This morning as I began my 9^th page in Chapter 8 in my life’s book entitled Opportunity,  I’m certain my heavenly Father demonstrated these thoughts for me as I watched that war of clouds in the morning sky.

© 2011 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

Still Daddy’s little girl

If you’re female and you’ve been blessed with an endearing relationship with your father, no matter how old you may be, you’re still Daddy’s little girl.

Our middle daughter recently called and wanted to speak to her father.   While he chatted with her, she surprised him with an invitation to spend a day out with her – just the two of them, her treat.

Hubby’s birthday falls in the same month as Father’s Day and daughter had promised him then she had a special gift in mind.  Between her job, wedding planning, and spending time with her fiancé, she doesn’t have many weekends free, but she set aside one Saturday just for her dad.

She planned ‘Daddy-Daughter’ day with an activity they both would appreciate.  These two share a love for historical places, so a trip to one of the local museums seemed perfect.  Unfortunately, this particular site closed early that day, so they took a detour to our city’s National Aviary and then a scrumptious dinner out afterward.

As always, our photography prone daughter snapped lots of pictures.  Anyone who views those photos easily could surmise that daughter and dad experienced a great day together.  I wonder how many twenty-something daughters care to spend a day with just dear ol’ Dad, and how many fathers really devote time to their daughters.  I think there are multitudes of daughters who desperately desire time with their fathers but are cheated of it, and that truly makes me sad.

My father was Dad to three daughters.  It’s safe to say, next to my mother, we three girls were the light of our Dad’s life.  He always treated us like his treasures. Even after we all became adults, he continued giving us gifts of chocolates on Valentine’s Day.    Dad loved spending time with all of his girls, and that included grand-daughters too.

Our father didn’t have a role model since our grandfather died when Dad was a baby, so our papa set his own fatherhood standards.  And they were exemplary.  My sisters and I never felt unwanted, unloved, or like our father didn’t have time for us.  Instead, we experienced the reassurance that we were taken care of,  protected, safe, and very, very loved.

And that is vastly important for a young girl as she grows up.  Research shows that fathers have just as much and often more influence on their daughters as mothers do.    One researcher (L. Nielsen) states a “father has the greater impact on the daughter’s ability to trust, enjoy and relate well to the males in her life…well-fathered daughters are usually more self-confident, more self-reliant, and more successful in school and in their careers than poorly-fathered daughters.”

All you Dads out there, it’s time to step up to the plate and tell your daughters how important they are to you.  Better yet, show them.  If you need some good pointers, I’d recommend this book, Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters:  10 Secrets Every Father Should Know, by Dr. Meg Meeker.

It’s never too late to let your daughter know she’s still Daddy’s little girl.  I know that I’m grateful my father made me feel secure in his love.  And today in Chapter 8, Page 5, in my yearly book called Opportunity, I’m also thankful my husband is that kind of father to our daughters.   Maybe that’s why the following Subaru commercial always makes me cry!

© 2011 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

How to celebrate a blogiversary – chocolate’s on me!

One of my favorite things is chocolate and another is writing this blog.

Obviously, I can’t share my to die for chocolate candy (pictured)  with you.   But I can share my thoughts with my friends and readers in written form here at Mama’s Empty Nest.

July is my “blogiversary” month.    I use the term month because I’m not sure which July date actually commemorates my blog’s anniversary.

Six years ago on July 9, 2005 on a whim and a dare from oldest daughter, I started writing a blog via a different site.  Recuperating from cancer surgery and not physically able to accomplish my usual summer to-do list, I needed something to occupy my time and mind.

Oldest daughter convinced me to create a blog on the same site she then used and I started putting my thoughts into written words again.  My writing topics ranged from silly thoughts to serious ones, everyday life to the change in thinking that a cancer (albeit a curable kind) diagnosis brings.  Once I recovered and returned back to “real life,” I only posted occasionally, when I encountered a little free time, until fall 2007.

And then… nada…zilch…nothing.  My blogging life ended.  Life got in my way.  Hubby and I still had kids in the nest, two sets of college tuition to pay, a calendar full of events to attend, jobs,  a home to maintain, and all of those dominated my waking hours.

With our youngest child’s college graduation last year and all of our children’s subsequent moves away from home, my world and waking hours changed.  I tried social networking for a while; fun at first reconnecting with old friends, but after the novelty wore off, I found myself sitting at the computer playing endless rounds of Reversi and Bubble Town.

Way to let the brain atrophy!  In between popping bubbles and knocking off Reversi opponents, I began reading a far-away friend’s new blog on WordPress.   One day, I realized how much I missed writing myself.   Why not take my love for stringing words together in written form down from the shelf, dust off my skills, and rekindle my blog?   So I moved my old posts from the previous site over to WordPress, started cranking out new posts on July 19, 2010, and my new blog, Mama’s Empty Nest,  was  hatched.

What happened next I compare to coming out of a coma.  Suddenly, my mind leaped into over-drive and so did my senses.  It felt like I had awakened from a very long winter’s nap.  Once I commenced writing, words just kept gushing out of me, words that were obviously bottled up inside for decades.  Ideas would spring into my mind when I gazed at a picture or often when a sight unfolded in front of my eyes, while driving,  and even while sleeping.

My senses seemed heightened – eyes wide open, observing things I couldn’t wait to write about, ears hearing sounds I previously must have taken for granted.  Every day occurrences in my world suddenly needed crafted and sculpted into paragraphs of written language, and I was constantly grabbing the nearest scrap of paper to jot down my thoughts before they melted away.

An old composition notebook became my new best friend in which I scribbled ideas, thoughts, and topics when they surged into my brain.   And then something truly amazing happened.  I realized I wasn’t just writing for myself and my closest family anymore.  Somewhere out there in cyber-land, people  – friends and strangers – started reading my blog and commenting!

A whole new world opened up for me [cue the theme song from Disney’s Aladdin]  as I gained new readers, blogging buddies, and very good friends.   I recently reviewed my posts from five years ago and marveled at the change I see in my writing and even in myself.

Where I once blogged as a way to fill up empty time, now I blog because it brings me joy.  Where I previously wrote whatever came to mind, now my posts have meaning and depth…and I believe, purpose.  I’m thrilled that a fellow blogger recently invited me to join the High Calling Blog Network where I only hope I can rise to the challenge of writing well about work, life, and God like the other talented writers there.

Today, on this 26th page of Chapter 7 in my Opportunity book of life – not exactly my blogiversary date – I  am astonished at how far I’ve come, but I’m more grateful to those who’ve traveled with me on this journey:

• to my family who always encourages me to write (special thanks to hubby who patiently listens to each of my posts while I read them aloud to catch any errors);
• to the friends who personally know me and read my work, spurring me on with kind words of support (you are great cheerleaders!);
• to my new friends, my faithful readers, and fellow bloggers (your comments and your blogs inspire me and I appreciate them so very much);
• to my Lord Jesus Christ who graciously gave me a gift which I must use for His glory and for allowing me to “see” through His eyes as I write.

So Happy Blogiversary to all of us! If I could, I’d share my chocolates with every one of you for the entire month of July!

©2011 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

Fallen and can’t get up?

The other day I fell.

I didn’t trip, stumble, stagger, tumble, slip, teeter or lose my balance.  I fell.  Hard.

I lurched.  I sprawled.  I dropped faster than the proverbial hot potato.  I was down for the count like a boxer who just took one to the chin and kisses the canvas of the boxing ring floor.   And I can blame it on my computer.

Sitting in my family room on my day off, I needed to complete a work project, so I had brought my office laptop computer home with me.  While working on that device,  I also decided to fire up my personal laptop.

I happily bounced back and forth between typing my project on the business computer to checking Facebook updates, email and blog stats on my personal one.  You see, I really am a bonafide multi-tasker.  I believe it’s my middle name.

Ward, the work computer, indicated his battery was draining fast, so I plugged his cord into the electrical outlet.  Of course, Penelope, the personal laptop, had to follow suit.  And she was downright pesky about it.  She kept beeping at me and then gave off a dire warning, so I located her adapter cord and plugged her in as well.

There they sat, Ward and Penny, side by side on the coffee table, recharging so they could further assist me, while I occupied the couch, crunching some numbers on a calculator.   And then the phone rang – not my cell, the house phone in the kitchen.

One minute I stood up to rush to answer the phone, the next minute I slammed into the floor.  Belly-flopped.  Face planted in the carpet.  Stunned and thinking, “What the heck just happened to me?”

I lifted my head,  expecting to have a bloody nose because I smacked the floor face first that hard.  Relieved to see no blood, I rolled over to take assessment of the rest of my body.  That’s when I noticed one of the laptop cords was still twirled around my big toe (yeah, I never wear shoes in the house) and obviously was the culprit for taking me down.

I slowly worked my way into an upright position, thankfully realizing nothing was broken on me or the laptops.  I vaguely remembered the odd sensation of lurching forward unable to catch myself, hitting my left hip on the edge of the coffee table and my right hip on the arm of the sofa on my way down to my crash landing on the floor.

I still can’t quite understand how Penelope and Ward managed to stay perfectly perched on the coffee table though, while I ended up sprawled on the carpet.    I always accuse both computers of having  minds of their own, and now I’m wondering if the two of them were in cahoots – you know, a conspiracy theory.

The day after my plummet, I definitely felt the damage – both hips bruised and even my stomach hurt from the impact.   For a few days afterward, you could have nick-named me “Hop-a-Long,” as I ambled slowly especially while going up and down our staircase.

So why write about obviously being a klutz?  I do so because it occurred to me, each time I winced from my bruises, that my fall describes what life is often like.  One minute you’re breezing along like nobody’s business, taking care of business, and then boom!

You’re laid flat.  Something knocks you for a loop.  The rug gets pulled out from under you.  You never saw it coming.   Those hidden obstacles send you reeling and flying.   That’s life.  There’s not much we can do about that.   Bad things happen.  Falls occur.  Things don’t turn out the way you expect.

But there is something we can do about the way we respond to the bumps and lumps, twists and turns, and belly-smackers and head-bangers on our way.  Do we wallow while we’re down, drowning ourselves with misery and “woe is me” attitudes?  Do we just give up saying, “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!?”  Or do we dust ourselves off, pick ourselves up, and move forward?

My middle daughter experienced her fair share of disappointments while she was still a college student.  An injury sidelined her from her sport of choice, but instead of feeling sorry for herself, she simply moved on and attempted something different – running on the college cross country team.

Once during an important meet, she was closing in on the finish line, when splat –  she fell!   Those watching all gasped.  She could have quit, she could have writhed on the ground weeping in despair.  But she didn’t!  She scrambled to her feet, planted a smile on her face, and finished the race bleeding knees and all.  I’ve always admired her courage and guts in doing so.

I’d like to think she inherited her determination from her parents, but I attribute her tenacity and optimistic attitude to her faith in God.  He helped her through the long haul.  She’s learned to hold onto her faith in Jesus for dear life and when we fall, as we surely do, He offers His hand to lift us up.

The Apostle Paul wrote in Philippians 3:12-14,  “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

My recent fall reminded me today in my Opportunity book, Chapter 7, Page 12, that even though life looks so very rosy right now at our house, falls will come.  Obstacles will cause me to stumble; circumstances will happen beyond my control.  But I must forget what’s behind and remember instead to press forward knowing that Jesus stands ever ready to help and guide me.  Even though I will fall,  He will always be there for me just as He always has been, arms outstretched ready to pick me up.

Deuteronomy 33:27 promises that to all of those who put their faith in Christ Jesus:  “The eternal God is your refuge and underneath are the everlasting arms.” 

What about you?  Do you believe God’s everlasting arms are always underneath you?  Won’t you join me today, right now, in thanking Him for always being within our reach?

“Underneath are the everlasting arms.  What child of God was ever allowed to fall lower than God’s underneath?” ~ H. Gill

©2011 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

The fine art of watering

I’ve been known to have a sharp tongue.  Don’t sit there at your computer with your mouth hanging agape while you read this.  I’m not always the epitome of sweetness and light, just ask my family.

Oh, as a stranger or acquaintance, you might glimpse a flash of my temper if you really, really make me angry.   I can deliver a strong tongue lashing, but in most cases, I try to curb my words and my fury.

It’s the right thing to do and most days I strive so hard to do the right thing, even though often I fail.  Quite some time ago, I had one heck of a day, you know the kind where everything seems cattywampus, nothing works the way it should, people irritate you, and circumstances beyond your control frustrate you.  And it was cold and rainy to boot.  That kind of day.

Feeling totally exasperated, I pulled into a gas station to fill my car. But after a couple unsuccessful tries, the pump just would not work.  I looked at the attendant, warm and dry inside the station, but he just stared out the window at me, exhibiting no signs of coming to my aid. Finally, I gestured to him (the call button didn’t seem to work either!) and he slowly meandered up to me with this insightful news:

“This pump isn’t working,” he said nonchalantly.  “You’ll have to pull around to another pump.”

Grrr.   Anger fueled by my frustrating day welled up quickly as I noticed the line of cars waiting for the other pumps.  I glared at Mr. Helpful.  He just shrugged his shoulders and that was the breaking point.

“Well, if you KNEW this pump wasn’t working, don’t you THINK it might have been a good idea to PUT A SIGN ON IT SAYING SO?!!!”  I yelled.  I whipped my irate words, each one getting louder and accelerating up a notch in angry tone, at him.  Again he shrugged and started walking away.

“Thanks for nothing!”  I mumbled as I climbed back into my car and he ambled into the station.   I pulled my car around to the long line at the opposite island and waited…and waited…and fumed…and  fumed.  If my gas gauge hadn’t been so close to E, I would have driven away.

And while I waited, I sensed the Lord telling me I was being utterly ridiculous.  What purpose did my anger serve?  Was it righteous anger?  No.  Would my wrath right a wrong?  Absolutely not.  All it really did was raise my blood pressure and provide fodder for the gas attendant’s tales of how nasty and irate customers can be.  But I was still hopping mad.

Finally, I nosed my car beside another gas pump, zipped my credit card angrily through the slot and started filling my car.  As I felt fuel coursing through the hose into my tank, I also could feel anger pumping out of me as well.  I felt like God’s presence was siphoning wrath right out of me.  In its place came strong conviction as I realized my venomous words had just given every person who calls themselves a believer in Christ Jesus a bad rap.   What kind of picture of a Christian did I paint? Not a very pretty one.

Cold and damp, I started to climb back into my car, but stopped, closed my car door and walked into the gas station where – you guessed it – there was a long line of customers waiting to pay their bills.  I forced myself to stay patient and when my turn at the cashier arrived, I told her I needed to speak to the young man behind her.

She glanced at him as if to say, “Now what did you do?”  He winced, walked up to the counter and looked at me like a beaten puppy.  I suppose he expected yet another tongue lashing.

I looked him straight in the eye and said, “I want to apologize for yelling at you out there.  I realize it’s not your fault the pump isn’t working and the station is so busy.  So..,” I paused, “I’m sorry.”

His eyes widened in disbelief.   His shocked co-worker looked warily at me then at him.  “Okay,” he said.   And that was that.

No illuminating beam streamed down from heaven.  No harp music swelled loudly on the store’s speaker system.   No one exclaimed, “Wow, you’re a great person!”  Nothing miraculous occurred except within my heart because I knew – I knew - I had done the right thing.   I did what Jesus called me to do, to apologize when I spewed forth unrighteous anger on someone.

Please don’t think I’m writing this to get any kind of accolades because I don’t deserve them.  I’ve experienced way too many times when I have succumbed to most unrighteous things.

Instead I share my experience because I believe God asks me to relate the change I felt in my heart that day – the joy and peace that flooded over me because I obeyed my Savior and Lord, acknowledged my wrong,  and doled out a little grace to someone else.   Grace, not selfish anger, is what He grants to me every day, whether I deserve it or not.

Unfortunately, my impatience and frustration often get the best of me.  I’m ashamed to admit in the past, my wicked tongue lashed out harsh words at those I love most – not strangers at a gas station – my husband and children.

But as I’ve matured both in age and spirit, I’ve allowed God to continue to mold me and change my ways.  The still, small voice of the Spirit helps me curb my tongue, use self-control and stop myself before I react in angry words…most of the time.  See, I’m still a work in progress.

Just the other day, I positioned myself on my front porch swing and read in the book of Proverbs again, noticing how many verses pertaining to wisely using words and controlling the tongue are underlined in my Bible.  At some point in my past, I had drawn a star next to this verse:

“Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” ~ Proverbs 12:18.

Obviously, God kept trying to teach me a lesson I’ve needed to learn for many years.

While reading, I observed the ruby red petunias nesting in our porch boxes needed water.  As I grabbed the watering can to pour fresh water on those flowers, an idea sprouted in my mind –  I am just like that watering can!  What pours from me when I am shaken a little or tipped?

When I pour forth words of blessing and encouragement on others,  it’s just like cooling, refreshing water flowing out onto my flowers, which will be nourished and grow abundantly.  But if words of contention or anger flow out of my ‘watering can’ over my loved ones and even those I find difficult to love, it’s like dousing flowers with poison.   They will shrivel up and die.

My words have the power to be poisonous or encouraging and I have the capability to choose which they will be.   Nourishing others and cultivating kindness is the right thing to do, even when I’m feeling impatient or frustrated.

In my sixth chapter of my yearly book of Opportunity, on this 28^th page, and every day, I know that’s what God calls me to do and I’m going to try my best.

©2011 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com

Waiting for spring

Zapped crocus

The sun shines brightly, but oh, the bitterly cold wind nips at my ears and bites through my jacket making me shiver and pull up my hood!

Frost sparkled across our yard this morning when, shortly after awakening, I peered out my window for a “look see” at the day.

That frost zapped my lovely yellow, purple and white crocuses and now they’ve wilted and seem to have the saddest look to them.

View out my window

Today I would have to agree.  We’re very close to flipping over the calendar to April, but at 20 degrees this morning, it still feels like winter.

The scene outside my kitchen window unfolds in all its brownness.  Drab, depressing, lifeless brown.

I step out onto my deck to snap a few photos, pull my winter jacket tight around me and brace for the cold even though I can feel the contradictory warmth of the sun shining on my face.

Transition to green

And that’s when I notice not all is clothed in hues of tan and russet.   Shades of green make themselves visible in my yard.

There’s a slow transition working its way through our lawn as the grass commences to green up.

I glance at the flower bed adjacent to the deck.  The plants that burst forth into bold color throughout spring and summer and long into fall now appear as dead as can be.

But then I observe bright spots of greenery poking through the cold, hard ground.   The plants are slowly coming back to life.

Out front, I mourn the loss of the crocuses but note the daffodils have pushed their way above the surface and there….my favorite hyacinths are gradually beginning their journey upwards.

Color, glorious color, patiently waits to unveil itself and I also must be patient to wait for it.  Because spring will come.  The flock of red-breasted robins scouring the yard for tasty worms tells me so.  One season does follow another and spring’s time is near.

“Spring shows what God can do with a drab and dirty world.” ~ Virgil A. Kraft

©2011 mamasemptynest.wordpress.com